First, welcome to this collection of posts I will never call a blog. I have to put that word in the website header for SEO reasons. Other than that, I’m going to stay far away from anything resembling that distasteful string of letters. Instead, henceforth and forevermore, I will refer to this website as The CoP (Collection of Posts).
I’m having one of those strange days where everything is absurd, and I have to really try hard to see meaning through all the absurdity as I scroll through the fiftieth Reel in which someone brags about getting a massive book deal or just being hugely successful as a ____ year-old author in general. I’m probably jealous. Really I just want to throw my phone in a lake and read/write as an escape.
There’s a strange sort of falsehood in existing as a new writer in the online world of authors. Nobody talks about it, which makes me believe I’m bitter. But that’s okay. Comes with the job, probably. As does the craving for an escape. Most writers have an addictive personality, I think. It’s almost a necessity. A certainty, the same way using the word “almost” in prose almost always signals insecurity on the side of either the character or the author. Perhaps the end goal for all aspiring authors is to become addicted to the craft—to the process, as Brandon Sanderson seems to be. But that’s difficult, isn’t it? If it were easy, all writers would be pumping out thousands of words a day. We would all be joining the legions on twitter in announcing our latest extraordinary achievement.
You have to love it. That’s obvious. But it’s difficult to love the craft while existing in this world of noise. We often dream of meeting our goals, but not of immersing ourselves in the process. We dream of the peak, not the climb. And not of shedding our identity along the way.
I guess I’m trying to say that if you can relate to anything written here, I hope you take solace in knowing it’s still possible to love the craft. And that you aren’t alone in feeling bitter, and being confused as to why. The peak is still reachable.
We’ll get there together.
— B.L Zen
Feeling: Chaotic 😕
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